It is not my norm to pray for - or even strongly desire - worldly possessions. I've never prayed for wealth, power, prestige, or pretty things. When we were looking for a van a couple of years ago, I prayed for an honest seller, a reliable vehicle, a smooth transaction, a fair price, and wisdom throughout the process. That's as worldly as my prayers have ever gotten.
I am one to pray for patience, peace, wisdom, and direction as God's plan unfolds. For God to use my life to serve others and glorify Him. That He would keep our family safe, and close to Him, through all circumstances in life. And that we would always know, embrace, and share His truth and majesty.
Yet, I have found that my prayers have become increasingly specific - about comfort, security, and peace of mind - over the last eight months. I have prayed for a specific job, that brings with it much more [worldly] security and reliability than what we have known over the last nine years. My husband is a hardworking, ethical, bright, god-loving man. His line of work has been impacted tremendously by work shortages, and we've weathered many lay-offs and uncertain times. We have faced these challenges with faith in the Lord to provide, and every time He does so abundantly.
"Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are?" Matthew 6:26
He has always provided for our every need, and we know He will continue to do so.
I'm a firm believer that God already knows our every thought, and that He wants us to come to Him honestly. So... I do. Although He has never, ever, failed to provide every single thing we need, I have prayed fervently that He would give Bryan this very specific job. I want Bryan's faithfulness, love, commitment and sacrifice to be honored with a job that is more reliable and less worrisome.
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34
We try; honestly, we do. But when you know your family's health insurance is expiring, your vehicle is on its last leg, and you could get laid off again at anytime, it's hard not to worry about tomorrow. How will we pay the insurance premium? What if the car leaves me stranded an hour away from home in the snow? This other job would relieve those concerns.
"Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God." Colossians 3:2-3
We strive to live in accordance with this everyday. In wanting this other job, we do not want extravagance, we merely want to catch a break, rebuild a little savings, start college funds, and to take the occasional family vacation without worry. Although we haven't "caught this break" previously, we know without question that God has been overwhelmingly generous in his provision for us. We are deeply grateful no matter how this goes. This is just the first time in my life that I've really wanted and been on my knees for what so easily sounds like money and material comfort. It feels selfish, yet honest. Tired, yet we are trusting that God will take care of us whether this job is "the one", or not. I feel like I'm asking God to allow this to be His will.
Either way, I know we will be fine. More than fine. We will be in His grip.
As I went to look up that last bit of scripture in my Bible, I left out the hyphen and went to Colossians 3:23. It was no accident that I landed on this gem.
"Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people." Colossians 3:23
This has always been our heart. Bryan and I both attempt to work - whether volunteer or paid - as if working for the Lord. We wish to honor whatever He has in store for us and know that "every good and perfect gift is from above". James 1:17